Spring Has Sprung: A Security Guard Welcomes the New Season

People ask me what spring feels like as a security guard. I'll tell you exactly what it feels like: it feels like everyone who spent three months hibernating indoors has suddenly rediscovered getting out of the house all at once, at full volume, and somehow made it my problem.

The radios come out. The frisbees appear from nowhere. Someone always tries to sneak a cooler past the gate on the first warm Saturday of the year like I didn't see them do the exact same thing last April. I see you, Gary.

But I'll be honest. There's something about the shift from winter to spring that even a woman in a high-visibility uniform can appreciate. The days get longer, which means my evening rounds end with actual sunlight instead of me squinting into the dark wondering what that noise was. People smile more. They wave. A kid handed me a dandelion last week like it was a formal peace offering. I accepted it with full dignity.

Spring also means the crowds come back; festivals, outdoor events, opening days of every park, venue, and attraction that spent the winter collecting dust. My boots get more mileage in April than they do all of January and February combined. My thermos switches from hot coffee to iced coffee. A woman must adapt.

So here's to the new season. To longer days, warmer evenings, and the eternal optimism of a crowd that genuinely believes this time they'll talk their way past the rope.

They won't. But I admire the spirit.